Sandy Hook

Sandy Hook Benefit Run

Perhaps the Mayan calendar was accurate after all. We're still physically walking the earth today but the recent event in Sandy Hook makes me question just how alive we still are.

I participated in a benefit run for Sandy Hook Elementary School this morning. About 125 runners showed up on a blustery cold first day of Winter to show solidarity and raise funds for the children of Sandy Hook. The event attracted runners from several states including champion ultramarathon runner David James. Kudos to Brian Vanderheiden for quickly organizing this event, which raised over $5,000. 

Brian advised us all to put our iPods & phones back in the car and use the 12 mile run to get to know each other and share our stories, about life, and about the Sandy Hook tragedy. Good call.

We kicked off at 9 AM running the first 26 seconds in total silence before proceeding to run the cold, barren course over the hills of northern Connecticut. To avoid creating more noise in a town that is already overrun, Brian organized the race to start a few towns upstate in Roxbury and finish at the center of Sandy Hook. Although grey skies, and barren trees painted a languid landscape, the inner beauty of rural Connecticut was conspicuous. 

As I began the run, I couldn't get the vision of the massacre out of my mind. I pictured Adam Lanza, still a child himself, bursting into a classroom that was filled with bright young cherub faces full of pre-holiday joy with smiles on their faces, and then unleashing the wrath of a military grade weapon en mass. I couldn't stop visualizing the horror on the childrens' faces in those few moments that bridged their innocence to  instant morbidity.  All their hopes, dreams, joys, and relationships gone forever. Extended families decimated forever. There are no nightmares that even approach the horror that took place.

I imagined myself as one of the parents of those children. How would I feel if I dropped my daughter off for school one day and she never came home again? Unfathomable. I thought about the joy, love, happiness, pride and challenges that I have shared with Danielle - what if none of that ever happened? How incredibly empty my life would have been by comparison. What if I never got to know Danielle's friends and their parents - some of the most lasting relationships of our lives?

About 3 miles in I met Joyce. Like me, she has kids that define her life. She talked about her son, a strong swimmer, who recently did a triathlon with her. I told her how proud I was that my daughter had started running 5Ks. Then we touched on the tragedy and what the hell would we do if that ever happened? Joyce paused and then said that a part of her actually hoped that yesterday would be the actual apocalypse.....it would forever numb the pain that we're all feeling.

At mile 10, we stopped at the bridge into town to wait for the other runners. Brian had planned for all of us to run into Sandy Hook together as a sign of solidarity. While we were waiting, a woman was running past us in the opposite direction with her pitbull Grace. She stopped and told us that she lives in Sandy Hook and her son attends the Elementary School. She used to run in town but she can't take the pandemonium that has overrun Sandy Hook: 

"Most people mean well but we can't even go to the store to get milk. People are taking each other's pictures in front of the memorials. I'm sorry but there are no Sandy Hook T-shirts for sale. I wish it would quiet down so we can get back to our lives and sort through this."

The runners finally lined up behind a Fire Truck that escorted us the final two miles into town playing Amazing Grace. We ran in silence, perceiving the increasing solemnity of the town as we neared the center. 

When we reached town, we saw the memorials - hundreds of Teddy Bears, Christmas trees decorated with ornaments in tribute of the slain children, messages of love and support from all over the world. At that moment, Satan reached his claws deep into my chest and tore my heart out. Tears started to flow from my eyes as I saw the faces of the children and the empty arms of all the teddy bears who were now all homeless. I looked around and most of the other runners were in a similar state, not many dry eyes. You can't help but be emotionally overwhelmed. 

I now understand the decimated look on President Obama's face Sunday evening when he stared at the same ghosts that I was seeing. Evil of this magnitude is truly difficult to digest and comprehend.

One of the runners' fathers was kind enough to drive several of us back to Roxbury to get our cars. We passed the Southbury Training Institute along the way. He told us that it's nearly empty now. Funding for mental health has dried up. The deficit is too high and austerity calls for available funding to go to defense, more guns, less compassion for those who need help the most. So they go unassisted, some of them dangerous to society. Kind of a fitting ending message for today's journey. 

I got in my car and cried my way back home. I'm so glad that I was able to participate in this event and help the children of Sandy Hook in some tiny way, but I doubt that I'll ever see life the same way again. Perhaps the Mayans were right after all.

Marathon Long Run

Few things are as therapeutic as the "long run" in marathon training. Two plus hours of solitude where your blood is flowing vigorously through every inch of your body, you're one with nature, accepting both her gifts and challenges, and you can focus deeply on the music in your earphones and your thoughts with no distractions. 

You feel incredibly alive while also getting your body and mind conditioned to sustained physical pain in pursuit of one of the greatest challenges in sports - 26.2 miles. It's a time to reflect on many things in life - work, play, family, and relationships. It brings peace to your world - it's magic!

Weston Long Run

Quassy

Just back from probably the most miserable racing experience I've ever had - at the Rev3 Olympic Triathlon in Middlebury, CT. The rain, wind, and cold combined to present the greatest challenge I've yet faced in a race.


The swim went OK, my pace continues to improve and I felt comfortable in the water. However, after we  rounded the last red buoy and I could see the shore in the distance, it just felt like forever to finally get to the transition. Mentally, I was visualizing the impending agony of pulling off the wetsuit and getting on the bike for 26 miles of tough hills in the pouring rain.


On the bike, from the beginning to the end it was persistent rain and an endless parade of hills. People have told me that Quassy is a tough bike course, and the weather just exacerbated the challenge to another level. On the seemingly few occasions when we hit flat land, it was typically at higher elevations where the wind was gusting and almost blowing me off the road. Usually the downhills are fun and a great opportunity to pick up your pace. However, they weren't fun when you were on dangerous rain-soaked roads and your brakes were totally non-responsive. It was our version of Quassy's amusement park thrills - heading down a hill at 40 mph in the wind and rain with no brakes! Athlete #901 summed it up best around mile 22 when she turned to me and said "This sucks!"

Off the bike, the run initially felt great. The rain had lightened to a drizzle and the route began relatively  flat. However, by mile three, we were headed back up some long hills and it started to pour again - just to remind us that this was a finish line that we were going to really appreciate.




During the race, I was thinking about how all of the athletes are facing the same conditions. We're all reaching for the goal that we've been working so hard to prepare for, and the weather, albeit miserable, is not going to prevent us from getting there. We probably all had crappy bike splits today, but the playing field was level and it's a race that none of us are likely to forget anytime soon.


This finish line felt more rewarding than most!

Racing is exactly like life in that regard. We face challenges every day and we need to persist and adapt to achieve our goals. Not all projects at work have the perfect combination of resources to meet the goal, but we adapt and persist. There have been countless musical performances where the crowd is unresponsive, or the musicians aren't clicking, but we adapt and persist. Personal and family relationships often get strained and go through very difficult times, but we evolve and persist.


If every project was perfect, and every gig was amazing, and every relationship was consistently fulfilling and without strain, and every race was sunny and gorgeous, it wouldn't feel nearly as rewarding as it does when you need to struggle through adversity to achieve your goal. That's a big part of what makes life so challenging, and frustrating, yet incredibly fulfilling. We work through the obstacles, regroup, and arrive at the next challenge that much better prepared. It's all about the journey!


My goal today was to win my division....I placed third.

Miami Fun!

Just got back from the Nautica South Beach Olympic Triathlon. What a blast this race was!

First off, the location is perfect for a northerner's late Winter escape. The beach is endless and peaceful. The water temperature couldn't be more perfect, and the water is crystal clear albeit very salty. I stretched the trip into 6 days and got plenty of open water swimming in while I was there. Ocean Drive has  a countless string of hotel restaurants for dining and drinking - I didn't have a bad meal at any of them. Tobacco women parade up and down the drive with a good selection of cigars to top off a great meal. If you enjoy people watching, Ocean Drive is a treat!

As for the race, it was a fast and fun course. The swim was amazing; the ocean was relatively still on Sunday morning when we started just before 7 AM. As we were swimming the 1,500m length, the sun was coming up on our left which made for a breathtaking morning experience to start the race. The ocean swim left plenty of room for athletes to swim without much contact. Although my time was not great, 42 min, the experience made for a peaceful start to the race.

My bike split was the best I've yet done in a Tri - 21mph over the 25 mile course. It's Miami....and flat. The biggest hills were the causeway bridges. Good crowds were along the course cheering us on and keeping us motivated. I got to pass several cyclists on the bike leg as I caught up from my poor swim.  The course was very similar to the ING Miami Marathon course I did in January although it was a lot easier on the Kestrel than it was on foot!

The run was a steamy out and back along the beach and I got through it just in time as the Miami heat and humidity was firing up as the morning progressed. My run time was good - 8:13 pace, which is borderline acceptable for the final stage of a long Tri. Overall I placed 10th in my division (out of 26), which is not awful but definitely not as good as I would have liked. I need to work more on all three sports, especially the swim.

I stayed in South Beach for a few days after the race. Took in a Yankee game at the beautiful new Marlins ballpark (after first going to the wrong stadium and missing 5 innings). Interestingly, there appeared to be more Yankee fans than Marlins fans. Hopefully the new ballpark will increase local interest and fan support for the Marlins.

With each trip to Miami, my affinity for that city increases. It's a multi-cultural city that has a unique combination of Latin and Jewish roots. Unlike LA, which dominated my racing season last year, Miami is closer and South Beach is a perfect place for open water swimming, dining and shopping. You don't need a car to have a great time as there is plenty to do within walking distance. Like LA however, if you do get into a car, be prepared to sit...and sit...and sit...in traffic.

Both winter races that I've done this year in Miami are definitely on the list for 2013.